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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27210406">sear me into your memory</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loki_Likey_Thor_Odinson/pseuds/punktaekai'>punktaekai (Loki_Likey_Thor_Odinson)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>TaeKai Alternate Universes [13]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>EXO (Band), SHINee, SuperM (Korea Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alpha Lee Taemin, Alternate Universe - No Band, Anal, Anal Sex, Betaed, Bonding, Bottom Kim Jongin | Kai, Caring Lee Taemin, Kim Jongin | Kai has Trust Issues, Knotting, M/M, Nurse Lee Taemin, Omega Kim Jongin | Kai, Omega Nurse Lee Taemin, Omega Verse, Past Abuse, Top Lee Taemin, Trust Issues</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 18:55:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,179</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27210406</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loki_Likey_Thor_Odinson/pseuds/punktaekai</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>taemin remembers everything about his omega</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kim Jongin | Kai/Lee Taemin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>TaeKai Alternate Universes [13]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1521983</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>71</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>sear me into your memory</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Taemin remembers when Jongin was too shy to do anything like this.</p><p>How he would hide at the sound of a cupboard shutting too loudly, scared that something was going to happen to him. How when Taemin worked over time, he'd come home and have to spend an hour finding Jongin from where he had hidden, too scared that Taemin wouldn't come home and had left him for good. How when any other alpha merely walked up to the front door, Taemin would have to coax him out from under the bed with promises that it was just the mailman bringing letters, or someone trying to sell Taemin something. </p><p>It had taken months for Jongin to not jump off the couch, fear in his eyes at the sound of sex from something Taemin was watching on his laptop. Months for him to not whimper seeing bonded couples kissing in public, the trauma of his previous life sitting heavy in his mind. It cost Taemin more than a few thousand to get Jongin the right help to feel comfortable in public, around Taemin's friends, for him to be able to sit on Kibum's couch for more than a few minutes before wanting to go home.</p><p>He still remembers when Jongin was first brought to their emergency home, desperately underweight, shaking at the mere look of an alpha, submissive to the point he was stuck in a primal mindset to do nothing more than obey. How it took him weeks to get Jongin to look him in the eyes as he nursed him back to a healthy weight. How it had taken the omega known nothing more than just... Kai almost a year before he could remember his name was Jongin, Kim Jongin, that he was 26, from Suncheon-si. How he spiraled remembering his family had sold him to the highest bidder because they were struggling to keep his alpha brothers alive.</p><p>Taemin remembers the nights he spent hunched over his medical desk, waking up with a sore back as he slept, the speaker to Jongin's room constantly on from the night terrors that often overtook him. The amount of times Taemin almost tripped over his wearable blanket when he was jerked from sleep by Jongin's screams, rushing to try and calm him down or sedate him.</p><p>Taemin still remembers the first time Jongin finally met his eyes, unprompted by Taemin. How he had started letting Taemin change his nutritional bag. How Jongin wouldn't eat even if another omega tried to prompt him to start his small servings of food now his gut wouldn't reject it, how he refused unless it was Taemin holding onto the chopsticks held out for him to nibble from. </p><p>The one thing Taemin doesn't really remember is when he fell for the omega that had eyes only for him. He remembers the realisation hitting him like a brick; when Jongin was comfortable to be put up as an available mate. How a young alpha had taken great interest in him and Taemin had, for some reason, told him Jongin was reserved and he was <em> “Sorry, it completely slipped my mind, I shouldn't have brought you here, we have plenty of other suitable omegas right this way, sir </em>.”</p><p>Minho and Kibum had lectured him, asked him what it was about and all Taemin could do at the time was shrug. Jonghyun had chided him, softly, reminded him of the rules of nurses taking omegas under their care and that he had to let Jongin be mated if Jongin was willing. Jinki had rolled his eyes and pointed out that Taemin was the only person who could get closer than eight feet to Jongin; how he was skittish even with other omegas and it was proof that Jongin definitely wasn't ready to be mated and he shouldn't be on the list for possible mating.</p><p>Taemin remembers when it fully flooded over him; his first day off since Jongin had been dumped on their doorstep. He'd tried to watch television, tried to distract himself with games, tried to sleep, cook, go for a walk, but his mind was constantly overtaken by the omega. When he finally got a text from Jonghyun just gone one in the afternoon that Jongin was unsettled, Taemin let his walk drift up to the omega center where he sat outside Jongin's room, calmed by his scent. Judging from the lack of whimpering and shuffling as Taemin sat there, his scent getting stronger the closer he was to Jongin, his presence calmed Jongin too. </p><p>That was when it first hit him, hearing Jongin slowly calm down from only Taemin's presence. How he was irritable and unsettled without the omega around. He'd written his two weeks notice and a form to become an alpha under the clinic the same day, submitting them to his superiors at the same time before he went home when visiting hours ended.</p><p>He worked for the two weeks, desperately praying his application to be allowed a claim of omegas at the clinic would be accepted. The thought of being rejected and never being able to look after Jongin once he left his job haunted him, kept him up at night, causing heavy bags under his eyes. His peers pried into his... <em> lack </em>of sleeping habits, concerned for him, but he just waved them off, napping whilst sitting outside Jongin's room when he could spare an hour or two.</p><p>His application was accepted on his last day, when he finished at three on the dot. By three oh five, he was outside Jongin's room, the door cracked open enough - now Taemin didn't work with the clinic, precautions had to be made which meant someone in the control room not letting his door open wide enough for anyone to slide inside. Jongin had disappeared when Taemin gently asked if he wanted to go home with him. Taemin promised that there was no pressure to bond or even date if he didn't want to, but he seemed disinterested. Taemin was sure he was feeling heart break for the first time in his life.</p><p>The door had opened further, Jongin stepping outside with his few belongings in the backpack, shyly holding his hand out. Taemin grasped his hand, feeling something flutter through him.</p><p>Bringing him home was more troublesome than Taemin had ever thought it would be - an oversight on his part. Jongin was so used to his small room in the clinic, it was no surprise that he would be amazed by the large park Taemin liked to walk through on his way to and from work, terrified by the cars and buses that sped past and lead to a lot of coaxing and <em> come on, I have plenty of chicken at home </em>.</p><p>Chicken, Taemin had learned, was most definitely Jongin's favorite, proved further when he treated Jongin with a trip into the local fried chicken take out half way home. He'd been amazed at the selection, eating an entire share bucket to himself whilst Taemin laughed around his wrap. Taemin opted to call an Uber for the rest of the way home, after a usual ten minute walk had taken almost half an hour, Jongin amazed as dogs came to him for petting, Taemin's gentle coaxing falling on deaf ears as he fell in love with every dog that passed him.</p><p>Taemin had smiled when they reached his apartment for the first time, opening the door and making Jongin wait on the doorstop. The look on his face when Taemin let Adam and Eve out of their space in the utility room was priceless, dropping to his knees with a thud that made Taemin wince, to stroke them and cuddle them, laughing like a child as they licked his face and learned the scent of the new human coming into their home... It definitely made the past two weeks of stress worth it.</p><p>
  <em> These doggies live here? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Mhm, this is Adam and Eve. They're yours too, Jongin, you live here now as well. </em>
</p><p>Jongin’s first night at Taemin’s had been… eventful to say the least. </p><p>First of all, Taemin had to explain what a futon was and that the bed wasn’t just on the floor because Taemin couldn’t afford a bed frame. Then he’d had to convince Jongin to say goodnight to Adam and Eve, explain that they aren’t allowed to sleep on the futons because they’re expensive and they’ve ripped them before and no, they’re allowed on the couch because the couch was already in really bad shape when Taemin bought it. </p><p>It had taken half an hour for a tearful Jongin to finally retreat from the dogs’ own small room and be herded into the old guest room, with the promise that they’d take the dogs on a long walk tomorrow. Taemin then had to explain that the strange noises from the ceiling were because he lived in an apartment and that people lived in the apartment <em> above </em>them, which had caused a twenty minute Naver search session explaining the concept of apartment buildings, what they were for and why they were sometimes better than a house. </p><p>Taemin had finally gotten into bed before he heard the distinct click of the dogs’ room door opening, sighing as he got up to herd Jongin back to his own room, with the <em> extremely </em>gentle threat that Jongin would have to stay home whilst Taemin walked them if he didn’t leave the dogs alone. Jongin retreated to his futon, pouting, but seemed to finally give in.</p><p>Taemin finally collapsed in his own futon, two hours later than when he would usually go to bed, only to be woken up what seemed like a few minutes later by the feeling of someone staring at him. He opened his eyes, jerking awake at the realisation that someone was standing by his bed, watching him in his sleep. After a few moments of internal panic and trying to remember where he had put that baseball bat, he realised it was Jongin.</p><p>“Jongin, you don’t just stand by people’s beds, it’s… it’s terrifying.” Taemin rubbed his face, relief coursing through his body at the realisation.</p><p>“It’s not a bed,” Jongin gently toed Taemin’s blanket. “It’s a futon.”</p><p>“Jongin, why aren’t you in your room?”</p><p>Jongin went silent, staring at the window for a moment before he knelt, climbed under Taemin’s blanket and curled up against Taemin’s chest.</p><p>Taemin’s breath caught in his throat, his heart souring. He’d admit, he had wanted the omega to come cuddle with him, free from the safety confines of the clinic, but he wouldn’t force Jonging to. For Jongin to come of his own volition, without being asked, made Taemin so happy it slightly hurt. Relief, care, adoration; so many emotions washed over the alpha, arm tight around the omega’s waist as he lay so he could take in Jongin’s scent with every breath he took.</p><p>Taemin remembers it all, every detail and he still can't quite believe where he and Jongin are at now. It’s taken months of them slowly building a relationship, Jongin learning to trust Taemin, to trust <em> himself </em>. Eight long months where Taemin even had doubts that Jongin would never recover enough to trust Taemin more than as just a housemate. </p><p>But now, here they were.</p><p>Jongin riding him, head thrown back, groans tumbling from his lips as he chases Taemin's knot, their grunts making enough noise that Taemin knows his neighbors will politely ask him if he and his mate could, <em> uh, keep it down </em>when he went out to get the mail tomorrow.</p><p>Taemin hisses as Jongin tightens around him, thrusting upwards once more, his knot inflating to secure their bodies together, both of them crying out as they reach their climax. Taemin sits up, as quick as he dares, to support Jongin before he loses the feeling in his knees, slowly laying back down, guiding his omega. </p><p>They lay in silence, the bond between them thrumming with nothing but love and adoration for the other. It makes Taemin's heart soar, carefully pulling the blankets up over them. Jongin shifts as much as he dares, getting comfortable on Taemin's chest. Jongin found Taemin's hand, gently interlinking their fingers, hand going limp as he drifted off to sleep. </p><p>Taemin watches his face, watching the content, peaceful sleeping expression of his mate and his heart thuds in his chest.</p><p>He can't quite believe how far Jongin has come. From being anxious at how large Taemin's apartment was, to the noises that came from the neighbours, to now being the one to often initiate their... nightly adventures. </p><p>Taemin remembers every single moment and this time, he opts to stay awake to watch Jongin, taking in every inch of his relaxed, carefree face. But for once, he wants to forget, wants to forget how scared Jongin was when he first met him. </p><p>Jongin's peaceful, relaxed and carefree expression as Taemin falls asleep has been seared into his memory - and it’s the best memory of his omega he could ever hope for.</p>
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